Have you ever, felt so lonely in the very place that you live, feeling of missing your family so much that it hurts? Have you ever felt just waking up one day, packing your belongings and jumping in your car and moving to the family you share so much with, having your sister's right by yourside enjoying the same intrests, having those veg nights together, growing old with them? Well I do, I have felt that way for some time, I have had a hard time wanting to blog lately for fear I had nothing positive to say, but my BFF sister told me this morning that "it doesn't have to be all good", she is right this is my blog and my heart and I can choose to feel just they way I want to feel.
I am not un-happy persay, just missing my sisters, my cousins, my neice and nephews, we all have so much in common and being together makes my soul feel good. Don't get me wrong I have my momma and I would pack her up and take her with me, and I have my wonderful husband, I have a sister that just lives in Fletcher but our lives don't cross to often much. Our lives seem so busy, going in different directions it is not for lack of love it is for lack of time.
I have felt very weepy lately for a number of reasons, and this just adds to my list. I have a wonderful most perfect Mother and Father-n-Law who make the time to be in my life, who treat me as if I was a daughter of theirs, but sometimes it isn't the same. While I love my sweet children that some people have allowed me to be such a wonderful part of their life, sometimes it just isn't the same, I could be riding horses with Lilly, hunting for treasures outside with Connor, I could be helping Stacy with the horses, sitting around the kitchen table with Dawn, and out on deck with Tami it is the simple togetherness I oh so miss... I know this doesn't make alot of sense but it is how I feel.
Pray that I will feel better about all of this, for this is heavy on my mind.
I miss my family...
It isn't an easy feeling being far away from family. It is a feeling I am very familiar with. While I am so close to Tami and dad, I am so far away from Nathan's parents who we love and miss so much. I am so far away from my mom and my other dad who I lived with and grew up with. Every one of my siblings is in a different part of the state of Texas, except for sweet Chadman who now just resides in my heart and in Heaven. When Nathan and I moved here it was a God thing, truly. Everything was falling into place, and we decided to do it in a matter of days. There is a reason we are here, and now we can see why we are here. There is a reason you are in North Carolina for the time being. Maybe it is to take Wings for Our Troops NATIONWIDE at lightening speed. You are getting it started on the East Coast. You have accomplished so much already. I love you Auntie Paige! I miss you dearly. I am thinking about you and praying that God comforts you heart, mind, and that he provides exactly what you need right now.
ReplyDelete